Just How Funny Are Your Best Buds?
Coworker Drama Pt. 2: Gossip & Giggles
PDF Just How Funny Are Your Best Buds Bamidbar
If you were to have observers listen to you joke around with your best friends, they would not think they are as funny as you.
This is the manifestation of a psychological phenomenon called ‘positive sentiment override’, in which one’s perception of another is disproportionately positive than what would be measured as objective. (We think the people we like are extremely humorous and pleasant).
The converse, negative sentiment override, also exists. A stark example of this occurs when the infamous group of spies returns from Israel and speaks negatively of the land, leading the nation of Israel to believe that G-d has sent them on a death mission. Israel says that G-d hates them, thereby giving in to having their perception of their relationship with G-d radically altered for the worse.
Even small rumors can ruin a workplace for everyone. Keep information realistic, factual, and related to the work at hand. Discourage rumors and gossip; promote positive speech and self-restraint with negative comments.
In marriage, the more positive interactions, validation, and the like that occur increase positive sentiment 
override. Marital happiness is far more about perception and positive effect than getting ones demands met. Keep things positive and avoid gossip.
[more on marriage and sentiment override]
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